Hi Deb,
I was just reading what you wrote to Jill the cop.
I am usually the one who winds up giving out the advice but what you said about your new normal slapped me straight into reality. I too am a type-A who needs to control everything.. It irritates me when I feel achy all day or don’t feel like getting out of bed, can’t do the whole grocery store, wouldn’t think of going to the mall.
It’s stupid to think I should be fine now but I’ve been through so much that I just want it OVER! You are so right. Thanks for the reality check.
We have much in common beside4s our names. I was diagnosed stage 2-a endometrial/uterine cancer in Aug.2009.
Had the total hysterectomy as well. My tumor markers test two weeks ago showed 9.3.
My gyn/onc said I’m to see him every 6 months and my breast/onc sees me now every 6. (Breast cancer and mastectomy in ‘08- stage 0.)
Why are you getting regular biopsies and should I be concerned that I’m not?
I am 3 weeks out of 28 radiations and 6 months of chemo before that. I lost a job that I thought I loved but midway through radiation I realized it was taking a huge toll on my small reserve of energy. Everyone I know is pushing me to speak with EEOC because I explained the facets of chemo brain and they ignored me. I had the CB bad! I couldn’t concentrate and had a difficult time getting through a complete conversation. It did me in. Oh well. I want to write, have a couple of good ideas, one is especially funny. Short term memory is returning and I can now remember names when we play “what was the name of that actor who was in that movie with that other actor?” and I’ll remember before everyone else does.
Thanks for listening and thanks again for the words.
xoxo,
Debbie

Posted on July 20, 2010 at 2:35:58 PM PDT by debbiedimatteo

Thank you for the support Debby. I will be praying for you and your family as you also make the journey down Cancer Court.

Posted on July 6, 2010 at 5:18:20 PM PDT by laverty1946

thanks for the comment debby! praying for you and your family as well!

Posted on June 21, 2010 at 10:37:33 AM PDT by survivordaughter

Hi,
Just checking to see how you are doing. I hope your last check went ok, I had not seen you post in a while. Take care and I hope you are all over the kidney stones.
Melinda

Posted on June 19, 2010 at 6:46:38 AM PDT by roses4friends

It’s not what was, it’s not what if, it’s what now. ~Author Unknown

Hi Debby,

Thanks for wishing me well today. I certainly do wish you the same this and every day.

Regarding being overwhelmed… The quote I started with is a bit puzzling but it is exactly how I handle being overwhelmed.

There’s a lot to do so select one notebook and make it as important as your purse or phone – have it with you at all times. Jot notes for every phone call, thought, question, “to-do”... and don’t be too organized. This is your external memory. Relax, everything is in there. Then you can do more formal planning from it.

Now, this is the important part for me and if you catch what I’m saying it may be for you too. Every time your mind talks to you notice if it’s talking about something from the past – then, say “past” or if it’s talking about something that hasn’t happened yet – say “future”. Once you start noticing how much your mind is cluttered with unchangeable things from the past and things that haven’t even happened yet, you can cut that incoming clutter and focus on what’s happening in the present moment. Sometimes that present moment sucks but it’s even more overwhelming is it’s being bombarded with “past” and “future” thoughts.

If this sound like something that might help clear & calm your mind, you can read more about it in “The Power of Now” by Echart Tolle. It’s not a new idea, you can also find it in Buddhism and many other sources.

I understand if all of that is too much to take on in the middle of a big health project so maybe this simple visualization will help…

It’s called “monkey-mind” When overwhelming moments take hold of you, sit still; close you eyes, take deep breaths; visualize a monkey swinging wildly back and forth. Through your breathing, slowly get ahold of the monkey and slow it down until you stop it. Focus on slowing your breathing with the slowing monkey. As you feel yourself relax, release muscles from head to toes. The monkey is still, release the visual and rest. All is well. At that moment you are well; in every moment you are well.

Okay, that’s a lot. I’m not usually so chatty. Peace be with you Debby.

Posted on May 25, 2010 at 7:22:52 PM PDT by sonja

Hi Debbie thanks for the well wishes. Yea about the baldie I love it. The one thing cancer taught me is that hair is overated anyway. I can’t imagine how the main concern in the chemo room was always HAIR! Should have been counting their blessings that we still had breath in our bodies. It was hurtful to see them literally hide under itchy wigs, scarfs, and hats, not realizing that they did nothing wrong and that their inner beauty surpasses everything. When trauma knocks you have to get creative and let the YOU shine thru. I shaved proudly, wore big earrings kept my makeup and nails always done and kept it moving. And it didn’t take guts either. My attitude was if someone that loves you stops loving you because you loose your hair, well they didn’t love you in the first place. Deb stay strong and be blessed. We have to do it right the first time cause there are no do-overs.

Posted on May 19, 2010 at 8:30:19 PM PDT by solliah

Debbie,
Your comment to Weezie was hilarious, though I’m sure the act itself is not so funny.
I often get a tilted head look, or ‘Gregory’, because of TMI; I like to say it like I see it.
Best wishes,
Greg

Posted on May 11, 2010 at 8:19:18 AM PDT by livingproof

Thanks for sharing your experience with severe anemia. This fatigue is really rough and sometimes just hits me all of a sudden and I am out like a light. I’ll probably be getting a transfusion next week, but I am going to ask about the iron supplements, especially since I start my last round next week, I know the anemia will bite again. And I’m thinking if I start taking the supplements by the time these symptoms would be popping up would be enough time for the supplements to start helping.

Posted on April 28, 2010 at 1:56:03 PM PDT by julie445

aahh, thank you Debbie, I am thrilled to get to know you “here” as well. I am with you on the crowd/emotion thing and that is what burned me years prior. This leadership has worked to minimize that total emotional baggage fest at retreat without completely eliminating a safe place for women to find support and share. It was a good balance. That coupled with my desire to find a new place in myself to be open to fellowship and some emotion on my part led to my enjoyment of the weekend. Not that I did not have a couple of times where I felt borderline emotional overload, but it was good to remember this was a retreat not a vacation and some emotional leakage was inevible. lol. I have worked to remember too that I need to balance how much a situation calls on me being there for others and others being there for me as well as compunicating outloud what my feelings are. NOT a strongsuit for me but I am growing! Another thing I can thank cancer for…damn stuff. hee hee.
Well my friend, I hope you are finding this day to be a blessing and you receive my emotion filled hug as a comfort :)...love to you! Larissa

Posted on April 19, 2010 at 1:49:59 PM PDT by larissa

Hi Debby,
Thank you for your kind thoughts!! I am glad that you are doing well. It is a tough thing this cancer. It really changes you in many ways. We are so blessed we have this forum to bond us together. You continue to be in my thoghts and prayers!! Love, lori in AZ

Posted on April 14, 2010 at 10:16:43 AM PDT by whyanyone

Hi Debby,
Thanks for the welcome message. I hope your biopsies continue to turn out normal. You’ve got a great sense of humor- really inspiring! I love it- “puking like a rock star”... I’m going to start boning up on the technique now, so I’m ready and in good form. Rock on!

Take care,
Kim

Posted on April 12, 2010 at 6:35:35 AM PDT by mathmom

Hi Debby,
Thanks for leaving me the comment about my jeans. I really appreciate your support. You’re right . . . life is a blessing and when we live it with gratitude, even more blessings come our way.

Posted on April 9, 2010 at 6:54:52 AM PDT by theresam

I posted a picture of “My” purple martins. Come on over to my blog and view.

Posted on April 7, 2010 at 5:22:16 PM PDT by stlbill

Debby,

Thanks so much for leaving such a supportive comment for my first blog. For so long I have turned to friends and family for support, but it is such a blessing to be able to converse with someone who really understands. I am so sorry to read about your mother and your recent diagnosis – my thoughts and prayers are with you and your daughter and family. God bless and stay in touch!

Posted on March 27, 2010 at 11:03:32 AM PDT by survivordaughter

you’re right, Debby. One day, one step at a time. Thanks.

Posted on March 23, 2010 at 9:47:04 PM PDT by joyce888

Hi Debby—
Thank you so much for letting me know about the spot on Nancy Grace about Trey Rood! Yes, this is surely him she was talking about. I have copied and pasted here the announcement on his FB support group page about the upcoming run to benefit him and three other young people with cancer.

“7th Annual Jog For a Cause, Fighting Childhood Cancer – 13 March 2010
The 7th Annual Jog For a Cause is a 5K/10K Race and a 1 Mile Fun Run. The 10K is a Peachtree Qualifier. Each person who registers will receive a high-quality, moisture-wicking shirt. You get a t-shirt if you simply register—whether you decide to run or not.

Jog For A Cause will benefit the following funds to fight childhood cancer: The Justin Gaudineer Fund, The Kylie Barry Fund, The Keira Grace Foundation, and The Trey Rood Fund.”

Debby, thanks so much for letting me know about this. Trey has, indeed, received a lot of attention in our area, but I had no idea he was being featured on a national televised program. Recently, there was a breakfast held which featured a couple of Atlanta Falcons players as guest speakers. The community has really supported this family.

Also, thank you for your kind comments to me. I appreciate that so very much and also your ongoing support for me and so many others on this blog. We really do all need each other! You’re an angel!

Hugs—
Martha

Posted on March 3, 2010 at 4:45:45 AM PST by mp327

Hi again,
Sorry, one more thing. This is my “heart child” on skis. ANd considering how tenuous his first few months of life were and the unknowns of his heart condition, I feel it is a miracle that he can participate in activities like skiing, and does so with enthusiasm and gusto!

http://www.youtube.com/user/dansherpa#p/a/u/2/AEeS1s56APQ

Heart hugs,
Ruth

Posted on February 26, 2010 at 9:53:51 AM PST by ruthkenn

Hi Debby,
No, my “heart child” is my middle child who is now 6! He has done EXTREMELY well, avoiding all those nasty complications (quick knock on wood) and has no restrictions on his activities. He is skiing this year quite well. Its his 3rd year on skis, but really only the 2nd year when he really “gets” it. I couldn’t be more proud of him also. He’s my miracle child. Thank you for asking! :) And I agree about the CV surgeons. We send his surgeon and his pedi card regular updates on Ewan along with pictures so they can see how great he is doing.
Warm wishes!
Ruth

Posted on February 26, 2010 at 5:59:56 AM PST by ruthkenn

Hey Debbie,
I heard through the grapevine that you have an interest in all of us getting together. where about in IL do you live? I am just across the Mississippi River from St. Louis, though I am very aware how scattered everyone is and I think a week-end of meetups would be so rewarding it would far outweigh the effort that would go into it. I’ve sent out a few comments of this sort to see where everyone stands, I would be more than happy to work on Hotel rates, etc. I believe that if I mentioned our group I just cannot imagine not getting a good rate. As far as airlines, despite some negative press as of lately, I have had some wonderful experience with SW, to the point of them sending me a voucher for $500.00 in LUV BUCKS so that Laura & I could go back to the Gulf of Mexico just one last time. They are big hearted at their corporate headquarters in Dallas. I have thought about this for a long time, then when we lost too many friends I thought we should at least give it a shot. I realize with member’s treatments, meds, obligations, planning this could be a nightmare but anything worth having takes some effort. Let me know your thoughts. I’ll do whatever it takes that is within my power & finances because I know it will be special. Keep me updated. Patty

Posted on February 26, 2010 at 1:37:43 AM PST by ibpatti32

Debby, thanks so much for your post! I am so thrilled things are going so well for you. I wish you continued good health. I’d like to correspond via email since you are a grandma and I am soon to be one. My email address is joyce888wilmoth@aol.com. I would love hearing from you..you have a very positive spirit! And congrats on being a grandma!

Posted on February 15, 2010 at 11:44:49 AM PST by joyce888

Hi Debby,

Thanks for the encouraging words. I hope you’re feeling well.

Take care,
Melissa

Posted on February 1, 2010 at 2:50:51 PM PST by melissad

Thanks Debby for those kind words. Hope you are warm and comfortable.
Jerome

Posted on February 1, 2010 at 2:05:17 PM PST by jpfrank

Hi Debby!

I am so glad that your mammo results turned out well! My mom was diagnosed with adenocarcinoma of her cervix in mid October. Her symptoms were exactly like yours but originated in another location. I have told her about this site and I am hoping she will start connecting with all of you soon. I will pray for you and your fight to win this. I can tell that you are a very strong woman. I know that God will bless you. Cancer doesn’t just affect one person, it affects the entire family. I am a daughter who is fighting for my mother. I will fight for each one of you as well. Keep strong!

Posted on December 11, 2009 at 5:55:48 PM PST by strong4mom

debby,
thanks so much for writing me. i hope that all is going well with you. taking it one day at a time is definitely the best advice anyone could give right now.. so thanks!! hope to hear from you soon.
claire

Posted on December 2, 2009 at 6:56:33 PM PST by clairenbear

Debby,

Thank you so much for those kind words. It’s frustrating to be a cancer survivor and see Pink everywhere. I guess it just goes to show that if you work hard with your efforts, they really will show off. I am hoping to do that with my non-profit, but only time will tell.

Posted on November 23, 2009 at 1:54:28 PM PST by katharine

Debby,

Thank you! I know it is sad but I will be ok! It just breaks my heart when I think about it…. Life just is not the same anymore! I hope that you and your family have a beautiful Thanks Giving….

Posted on November 22, 2009 at 7:51:57 AM PST by janet

Dear Debby,

I just saw my surgeon Wed. but still have not mustered up the nerve to ask her about my organ snatcher greeting. She has such a great sense of humor and teases me unmercifully so I have to assume she may have chuckled a bit. I am praising the fact that I had clean scans again! I am scheduled mon. for a test to check for a blockage in the intestine but then get my 4 months off! What a way to enter this blessed Holiday season…Blessed!
I too am wishing you and your family a holiday season filled with love and happiness. Make some cherished memories with everyone you come in contact with and reach out to those can!

Love to you!
Larissa

Posted on November 21, 2009 at 6:02:46 AM PST by larissa

Debby – thanks for your comment. Let me know what the techs say at your mammogram. I am so curious. Have a great day. thanks!

Posted on November 20, 2009 at 6:52:28 AM PST by jill

Hope you are doing well. I have not seen any recent postings. You continue to be in my prayers.

Posted on November 16, 2009 at 5:45:53 PM PST by nnnnnny

Hi,

Since I no longer have a colon I don’t have the colonoscopies. Now I just have sigmoidoscopies and the scans. They are not as frequent as every 3 months but they do seem to come around quicker than I feel ready for. Although they aren’t that big of a deal it’s another trip to the doc and a slap of reality. That’s our lives thought, and we wouldn’t give them up now would we? :D

Be blessed sweet lady,
Larissa

Posted on November 2, 2009 at 5:43:56 PM PST by larissa

Debby-
I hope you are recovering well! I am currently making some gyn bracelets for our gyn oncology floor at my hospital. I wanted to ask you if they have a procedure or not for identifying lymph nodes that may or may not be cancerous in the lower abdominal area like they do for the breast? In the breast it is called sentinel node biopsy. This way they don’t take out more nodes than they have to if they are not cancerous. I found out the hard way just what that can do to one’s arm! Even with only 6 nodes removed in my breast surgery last year, it made my arm vulnerable to infection and I ended up with MRSA and was hospitalized 3 weeks ago and had to have the infection cut out of my arm. Scary ! I’d enjoy chatting with you about your diagnosis and life in general as you face your cancer. You can e-mail me motherspreciousgems@comcast.net
Hope everything is going well and you are getting stronger each day! YOU ARE NOT YOUR CANCER! You are so much more!
HUgs-
Koryn

Posted on October 29, 2009 at 5:43:48 AM PDT by korynh

Thank you Debby

I really appreciate your comments.
I will keep you in my prayers.

Hugs

Posted on October 28, 2009 at 8:20:52 PM PDT by saddaughter

Hi Debby, thank you for supporting me. I hope that you are well and in good spirits. I know it’s easier said than done, but we must all stand strong and never give up.

Eli

Posted on October 27, 2009 at 3:13:03 PM PDT by eli

Deb,

Thank you for the email. I know surgery sucks and I leave it up to my daughter which I know sucks but she is my life so if she says yes mommy I want you to live go for the surgery I go for the surgery. I think having the surgery really blows but that is it.

I am different from some people I just do not have the faith in the man anymore. I use to go to church. I had faith but now I just do not believe anymore. How can a god make a person go thru this? I will never understand? I had a very hard life.

I use to walk to church when I was in foster care and he use to help me thru all the crap I had to go thru and he helped me make it. Now I say why to all of this I will never understand…

Posted on October 24, 2009 at 9:10:25 AM PDT by janet

Also keep fighting! I wish you the best always!

Posted on October 21, 2009 at 2:19:53 PM PDT by janet

Deb,
I had the uterine cancer but they treated that right away. I was very lucky! This Brain Cancer will be more surgery I am sure. I leave it up to my daughter. I know that sounds crazy but if she says yes I want you to live as long as you can mommy then I go in for the surgery. I hate to think about going thru it but I do it for her. I asked her when they told me I needed another one. They told me I may live longer if I have another one. If they take more tumor out they hope it gives you a better life. I am not sure about that since I still have tumor in my head I really just do not know what to say. All I know is with tumor in your head all you can do is go thru surgery. I think it sucks! I know there are more people out there whow have had more then two operations on the Brain but it all sucks…

Posted on October 21, 2009 at 2:18:38 PM PDT by janet

Oh Debby,
If it makes it any better, the memory of this day and all those beautiful babies made me cry the whole time I was typing. This as well as the fact my friend had just phoned to tell me that after a llloooonnngg battle she was given those treasured words…”you are cancer free”. She cried for the thrill of being free and the shame of being so happy while others of us will not ever hear those words. I wish that she were free to sing out how happy she is and not feel a burden. This cancer sure messes with our minds. I cried tears of happiness and did the “happy” dance for her assuring her she needed to dance, and she was my hero for being so strong. I am thrilled to have the chance to know so many heros by finding this site and have to say you have been a blessing among those! We are enjoying everyday of this beautiful Fall as I hope you are! Take the time to “live it up” today and everyday to come my sweet lady.

Blessings and love to you,
Larissa

Posted on October 21, 2009 at 1:33:11 PM PDT by larissa

Dear Debbie,
We celebrated #23 this last September 6, so you are correct that we have two years before the big 25. An island somewhere would be just my dream, how did you know. I said before I leave this earth I want to see a Fall back East (just got back…aaauuhh) and the Carribean..still to come! I can’t wait. Maybe it will have to be for my 24th. :) You are such a sweet lady to see those little details, thanks for that. You continue to take care of yourself! :)

larissa

Posted on October 19, 2009 at 3:38:58 PM PDT by larissa

good luck and much strength to you as you go through this process. your way of writing with no caps first captured my interest since that is my ‘default’ too, then your blog captured my heart..i do wish you wellness, with a quickness, Godspeed.

Posted on October 15, 2009 at 8:45:55 AM PDT by anniettie

Thanks Debby. Your remarks are kind and helpful.
Jerome

Posted on October 5, 2009 at 8:31:30 PM PDT by jpfrank

Hi Debby—
Thanks for the comment on my bio page. Sounds like we are both good midwestern girls from Illinois! I grew up in a small farm town near Decatur, so not all that far away from where you’re at. When you told me you once lived in Chilicothe, it immediately took me back to church camp at Lewiston one year, when I absolutely fell “in love” with a boy from Chilicothe. Either it was too long ago or I wasn’t really all that in love with him, as now I can’t remember his name! :) I hope your recovery continues to go well and that you are now free of this disease that haunts so many of us. I wish you continued improvement and to be well for many, many years to come! Take care.

Martha

Posted on October 5, 2009 at 3:56:28 PM PDT by mp327

Hi Debby,
Thank you for your welcome message. Roscoe is just north of Rockford, between Rockford and the Wisconsin state line. Not too far from Peoria. At first glimpse it might appear to have been “the phone call from hell”, but it is sometimes hard to see the big picture that God paints on his enormous canvas because we’re in the picture. Time will tell. It’s like what you said in your first blog on 8/24 (I did read it), “I am pretty accepting of what is happening. I am good with God and have had a good life. Hoping for a cure… but accepting if that is not to be.” I pray that throughout this adventure I can come close to being as supportive as everyone else on this blog has been. It makes such a positive difference and I know from experience that it is great therapy. P.S. Happy to hear your good news today that your “oozing” is nothing to be too concerned about. Keep being thankful.

Posted on September 24, 2009 at 5:43:24 PM PDT by greg

Hi.
Yes, my sis is with me. I did so love germany and my hubby gets to go to Berlin next. I need to stay home to be mama. :) But was sure fun while I was there. Is the baby your sin pic? So cute.
BARB R

Hi Debby

Thank you for you kind thoughts and prayers.

I hope you keep fighting, and my thoughts and prayers are with you.

Donna-Jayne

Posted on September 23, 2009 at 7:45:40 AM PDT by donnajayne

Yes, I would agree that God always seems to know what we need! I am amazed and inspired by how many wonderful people are still in this world. I pray that I can give back just a bit of what has been given to me! Be blessed today!

Posted on September 13, 2009 at 12:13:53 PM PDT by larissa

Hey Debby,

First of all, thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful comments. I so appreciate your support and look forward to reading your posts.

Second, I’m starting chemo on the 22nd because I will be graduating from a law enforcement leadership academy I’ve been attending for the pat eight months on the 14th-16th and can’t bear the thought of missing it. Because I needed to get some additional tests done prior to starting the two trials, they didn’t think I’d be ready to go the week of the 7th, so they were comfortable with going on the 22nd.

I hope you’re well and strong.

Keep fighting!

Jill

Posted on September 3, 2009 at 8:20:54 AM PDT by parkerfu